oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
