The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Sorry my hands just texted you
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
