Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
