Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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