Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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