she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Blood and glitter go together right?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
