Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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