Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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