sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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