she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
birth control should be required to get into college
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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