i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
