I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
