Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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