Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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