I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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