just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize