Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize