Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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