i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize