No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
Randomize