and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
