what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
