singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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