idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
