Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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