just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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