Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
