At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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