I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Im part way to drunk.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
