Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
