garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I think your dad took our porno
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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