Me. At least after what I've been through.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
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