you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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