didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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