Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
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