Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
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