Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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