I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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