I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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