quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
