Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
