ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I didn't notice because vodka
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
