so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You've changed since you got that strap on
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
