YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize