North Korea, Best Korea!
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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