i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
