so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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