literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
