is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Randomize