Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
